Tuesday, June 24, 2008 @11:15 PM
Been falling asleep and being really sleepy during lessons. Doesn't help that it has been a DITD start to this term. I think of the holidays, and I feel that sleeping at about 11pm is boring, and staying up until 5+am before going to sleep is horrifyingly lonely. Not much I can do, can I?To madapple, emo rants are difficult. I want them to perfectly show my emotions but there's a thick brick wall over there. And it's virtually impossible for me to contribute when I'm not able to do so. I've failed at my goal or goals for this year, but hey, it's okay. I've learnt not to expect much. There's the tendency for hope to rise, but I'm learning to control it.Let everything go and study and train without a mind.Frequently, I tell myself, okay let's pretend my life up to this point never happened, my past is totally invisible, erase it all, and tomorrow, will emerge a totally new and different me, a brilliant me.And it's all an illusion. As everything is.Oh wait did I mention? I'm limping and hobbling. But it doesn't matter. Really.
♥ you and i both loved