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Wednesday, June 24, 2009 @10:25 PM

How did Maria Sharapova lose?!

Thanks for getting me hooked onto the match! (Back to chinese now, sorry!)

♥ you and i both loved

@12:10 AM

I definitely cannot, will not, am unable, am incapable of making it to December. *Humourless laughter*

Thank goodness for sleeping at 3am! When nothing else matters and time seems to stop.

Don't you crave the solitude? =D
I know you can't stand people watching you.
You despise familarity even more.

♥ you and i both loved

Thursday, June 18, 2009 @11:50 AM

I've been listening to ronan keating songs for the past hour, being influenced after reading cassandra's blog. It's a good thing actually, because I'm dying for classics. Modern pop/rock isn't doing the job now, not to mention dance/techno.

I'm still delirious after managing to call in to Soo at 2.40am, which meant that my voice is on national radio tonight. Maybe it's not that significant, but lying on the bed in the dark at 2.40am easily causes your emotions to be haphazard and run wild. I could sound like a duck (still remember), not pleasant but at least distinctly male. Something that can identify my gender, since my name can't do that job properly. I was rather nervous (shaky) that I didn't manage to dedicate Big Girls Don't Cry to people I wanted to dedicate it too. Argh!

Not very well, but there's always a second time.

The annoying toddler could be crying and making a nuisance, but don't you wish to be back in that position once again? We're growing too old, too old to be thinking of death.

And you wonder if she has feelings for you? Or if she is an empty hollow void, looking at you with the same expression, with the same intensity, with which she looks at 2000 other people who pass by her.

It's an uneasy feeling how the word "grandparents", especially "grandmother", has become an extremely sensitive subject, to me. Mentioning it in front of my parents, simply creates a tense, uncomfortable atmosphere. When people mention it, it simply drags back memories. It's true that you'll only miss a person terribly after she leaves. It's not only the reality of losing your grandparents before 15, not having them to witness your graduation, your wedding, but.
Guilt.
Guilt for treating her indifferently.
Guilt for not according her the respect she deserved.
Guilt for not loving her enough.
Guilt for never ever having the opportunity to say "I'm sorry".


And I wanted to smash my phone so badly. You will never go away, will you? The hate burns very brightly. It does.

♥ you and i both loved

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